Oh....No

I cannot make you change I know
I cannot make you be the man I thought you once were
All that I can do All that I will do is learn alot more about myself
I know I hated watching sports complete waste of time
I hated when you left your shoes in the middle of the floor
I hated that you thought my clit was something to bite
and I hated when you never wanted to put up a fight
I hated the way you had to hit the blunt
I hated that you always put up a front
like you were a honest, caring, loving man
I hated I loved you but oh well I cannot make you change.

What I Want in a Man

I want him to be funny
compassionate
loving
have a job
no drugs of any kind
he can be widowed, divorced but most of all please Lord let him be single
I want a working man, a fixing up the house man, a hold my hand man but most of all I want him to be only
MY MAN
I want a brother to be a slow, tender, long lasting, kiss my toes lover!
Lord if he comes with kids that's fine too. We can be some Brady Bunch picnic's in the parks
at the Ceaser Land and p.g. Movie lovers
I just want him to be a Man
I want to know when I'm in the room the only thing he is watching is me I don't care if Halle Berry walked in and did a striptease!
I want my Man to answer his phone every time I call.
I want my man to want to show me off to the world
I want to know every one he loves so that I can grow to love him even more
No game players, smooth talkers, users, cheap and selfish dudes need not apply.
See cause I'm Grade A with a sweet disposition unless you make me mad.
 I don't nag
steal... cheat... downgrade you. All I wanna do is cater to you.
If I'm giving my all you better damn sure give yours
My skin is soft
I smell good
I know how to cook
and I am Sexy as hell.
I don't have the time or the energy to play games to old for that
It's time to get my grown woman thang back.

Now I know

I know why she slipped
she slipped cause walking was too fast
she slipped cause her life was not meant to last
She went there time and time again cause the pain was too great to bear
she did it cause being alone was her fear
they sent her over the edge
they made her knees burn from beg
She was no longer alone
living in a bottle became her home

Happy Birthday Ms. Hill!

I love this video because it shows the only thing that changes is time not problems. Same shit different day. When I bought the CD I knew Lauryn Hill was the truth.  When she sings about the pretty faced men claiming that they did a bid men need to take care of their twenty four kids men. I lmao. Listen to the words cause this will still be the truth fifty years from now.

The Watcher

Do you wanna watch?

Look...See...Touch

moving slowly gyrating

up and down

round and round

Lust, boredom, curiosity it's all there

Do you wanna watch?

wetness from fingers slowly touching private places
 Silken skin reaching back pulling in

Smell...me...now

Do you wanna watch?

Faster harder fire in my blood

Heat from my love

You are watching cause you wanna watch.

SHIT

 Boy meets Woman who already has it going on
House, Job and Money in the Bank
His eyes pop out his head looking at the money she makes
Shoulda said keep it moving little boy...but that clock was ticking in her head
All his SHIT was in the past crackhead jailbird baby daddy
His SHIT was all their shit making one huge pile of trash
stinking to the highest of the heavens
Her first mind said walk away... no RUN FAST but that  clock kept ticking away
She covered her eyes against the warning the red light flashing telling her to stop
She found the dress, paid the preacher, bought his suit and said "I do"

Murder in the first degree

Three...I've murdered three
Not without agonizing over their deaths
I plotted every detail, I made sure they went as quickly and painlessly as I could
but nevertheless I am a murderer.
I committed my first murder when I was nineteen young by far but I did it in order to save myself
I shall call this murder in self defense
I waited six years before the need to kill came upon me again
This time I did it on order to save my marriage
This one haunted my dreams and caused many sleepless nights
The last time I killed was to hide the truth of an unhappy marriage
I had accomplices those who never knew how each murder penetrated my soul
Those who handed me money unwittingly to kill
Each time I took their blood money I cringed
Then I lay back took a deep breathe and begged GOD for forgiveness I committed murder
I know one day I will have to answer to those small clots of blood that held fingers and toes, brains and bones...I'm  prepared to tell them why.